Ten Practical Rules
for Reducing 'Intolerable Tensions' to Tolerable Nuisances...
1. Neutralize Nuisances"One need never be surprised by an unfavourable tern of events. This does not mean becoming cynical and pessimistic: it is only putting to use one's knowledge of 'how the ball bounces'."
2. Keep Your Sense of Proportion
3. Be Wary of Conscious Excuses 'Explaining' Tensions"The origin of your tension is internal, and the originator is yourself."
4. Reproaches of Inner Conscience on the Conveyor BeltSooner or later everybody must face this unpalatale truth: you are not even "master in your own house" (Freud). You are...manipulated by your unconscious, even though you have the conscious illusion of self-determination."
5. Unconscious Self-Damaging Tendencies Are Universal, and You Are No Exception"If you are a person with a comparatively limited streak of neuroticism, you...[may] manage to keep [some areas of your] life free from masochism, and therefore pleasant and satisfying. If your appetite for self-torture is great, you...are always unhappy... A minimum or maximum of injustice collecting results."
6. In Counteracting 'Tension', Start with the Trial Balloon: Your Inner Conscience Reproaches You with the 'Pleasure-in-Displeasure Pattern'"...you never know why you have been indicted, or what crime you have been accused of committing..." (It all happens unconsciously: see Adult / Drama link)
7. and 8. Unmasking Your Participation in Injustice Collecting(see Adult / Orality link)
9. Remember the Precept:
"...the not-too-neurotic person is not unduly affected by disappointment...The psychic masochist, on the other hand, unconsciously rejoices in disappointment and finds it pleasurable. His unconscious pattern prevents him from minimizing it..."
Depression Isn't an Adequate Reaction to Disappointment
10. You Cannot Eradicate Nuisances, But You Can Keep These Below the 'Tension' Level"...to see a minor annoyance in its true proportions [ask yourself] 'Is this injustice collecting, or isn't it? Am I dwelling on the incident, enlarging it, turning it inside out to extract the last drop of irritation, humiliation, or refusal?"
--Quotes taken from Tensions Can Be Reduced to Nuisances (1960). See pp. 144-152 for more detail.
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